At the crossroad

I have decided that I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up.

What an inconvenient time for this shit to pop up.

I tend to be somewhat of an illetist. I have a higher than thou idea because, well, I am. I knew what I was going to do when I grew up. I was going to finish my double major and head over to optometry school and drive Ferrari's with my male harem.

*Cue husband and son from stage Left*

Damn.

The double major went out the window with morning sickness and I am going to be happy just to have one major with a 2.5 GPA by the end of my college "career". And what will I have to show for it? A big fat B.S. in Religious Studies. Sure, it's what I want to do, what I am interested in, but where does that lead me?

I'm just so confused so I decided to do the fall back career, a teacher. Hooray. Well, apparently teaching isn't such a hot career. So I flipped back to Optometry and then realized that how am I going to be Doctor, Mom, and Wife?

I can't. So I sit and whine. My relationship with said Chaddillac started to go down hill fast and we are reinforcing everything with cement but even that is taking its toll.

Do I become a stay at home mom and destroy myself with self-loathing?
Do I become a doctor and kill Chadillac's love for a 6 person family?
Do I become a teacher and have it all except financial freedom and fulfillment of dreams?
Do I become a reclusive author who makes millions?

I know! I shall go huddle in the fetal position until I figure it out!